I haven't done a running diary yet in 2011, but with a brand new pitcher making his debut for the Astros in Henry Sosa, I decided to pull out the old play-by-play for Wednesday night's contest against Josh Collmenter and the Arizona Diamondbacks.
First inning: Sosa (sheesh, are we sure this isn't Alberto Arias? Or his twin brother?) starts out his major league career by giving up a homer and a double to Willie Bloomquist and Ryan Roberts, respectively. I'm already thinking: Sweet, glad we could call up this guy way too soon. I wanted to say the same thing when the club called up Jordan Lyles at the not-quite-ripe age of 20 in the first half of the season. But see, he had a dazzling debut against the Cubs. So everyone told me to shut up. Pitching coach Doug Brocail visits the mound after just one out. After retiring Chris Young, Sosa gives up a bases-loaded double to Paul Goldschmidt. 3-0 already...this could be a long night.
Second inning: I just found myself wondering why the 'Stros didn't wear their brick red away unis, and then realized that if they had, it would be pretty close to impossible to determine which team was which, as the D-backs had on their own brick red home shirts. Meh. I like the grey roadies better anyway. Having HOUSTON across your chest would be pretty sweet. Brian Bogusevic walks, but that's the extent of the Astros' attack in the top of the frame. Sosa settles down and retires the Arizona hitters 1-2-3.
Third inning: Collmenter is serving up the high meatball tonight, and the Astros hitters are absolutely eating it up. I mean, I knew this guy was a fly ball pitcher, but holy crap this is insane. Meanwhile, Sosa bats with no gloves. He's a pitcher. Raw. I'm afraid, however, that he's the right-handed, Hispanic version of J.A. Happ, the guy he replaced. Consistently falling behind in counts, giving up lots of solid contact, doesn't have any one pitch that's very sexy or useful...
Fourth inning: Sosa walks Collmenter...I'm seeing Happ here people...Bloomquist ends up grounding into a double play, but Sosa is already up over 70 pitches.
Fifth inning: ATTENTION: The no-hitter is over. Bogusevic singles under the glove of Goldschmidt. Jimmy Paredes follows with a rippin' double down the right field line. Barmes falls for the meatball and bloops a single into right that turns into a double, scoring Bogu. Humberto Quintero joins the bloop party, singling to center to score Paredes. Collmenter settles down and retires everybody else. Astros cut the lead to 3-2. In the bottom half, Justin Upton rips a double down the left field line. Anyone who doesn't think this dude should be the NL MVP should just flip on the TV. Sosa channels his inner Nelson Figueroa and serves up an 0-2 down-the-chute fastball to Young, who hammers it over J.D. Martinez's head, scoring Upton. 4-2 Arizona.
Sixth inning: Collmenter retires Martinez for the third time tonight. Sure, the guy has a wacky swing, but up until this contest, he's been killing the ball with 4 dingers in 10 games. We just might be seeing the left fielder of the future, folks. Sosa retires Goldschmidt on three pitches to end the frame. He sure has settled down, and if not for that grounder double by Goldschmidt in the first, this might be a very different game.
Seventh inning: Collmenter looks like he's past that problematic 5th inning, retiring the Houston hitters 1-2-3. He still has the weirdest last name in baseball. I don't like typing it, or looking at it for that matter. Collmenter. It just sounds weird. Meanwhile, Sosa, with a middling final line of 6 IP 6 H 4 ER 4 K 3 BB, is pulled at exactly 100 pitches for troubled reliever Wilton Lopez. While the numbers don't exactly support the notion (he's sporting a 2.92 ERA), I don't think I'm the only one who's a bit disappointed in Lopez's performance this season, especially considering his electrifying appearances that he threw out with regularity in 2010. True to form, Lopez gives up hits to Roberts and Upton (his third of the night...won't be sad about not seeing him anymore). Sheesh. Brad Mills opts for Sergio Escalona, who strikes out Miguel Montero. And since Mills is entertained by by switching relievers every batter, he decides to bring in my least favorite pitcher, Jeff Fulchino. He proceeds to fake Upton off of first, which then results in an errant throw to Barmes at second, allowing the runner from third to score. Sweet. I love a guy who can't pitch and then can't throw to second base. I swear, having an inept defense is the most frustrating thing for a baseball fan to handle. 5-2 D-backs.
Eighth inning: Collmenter is pulled for Bryan Shaw, who I know nothing about, so don't ask any questions. Mills pinches Angel Sanchez for the pitcher. It baffles me that Brett Wallace and Chris Johnson are wasting away at AAA, and Sanchez is not. Give me a break. He of course ground out to second. J.B. Shuck and Jose Altuve both single, and Martinez walks to load the bases for Carlos Lee, who aptly grounds out, but at least not into a double play, so Shuck scores. Bogu sucks as usual, and is retired. 5-3 Arizona. Aneury Rodriguez becomes the fifth Houston pitcher of the night, and gives up a leadoff walk to Kelly Johnson. Should Rodriguez have been the starter tonight? Hard to call, as Sosa basically looked like a clone of Rodriguez through the first 6 frames, posting either a great half-inning or a terrible one, albeit with not near as many strikeouts. Rodriguez reminds me of LaTroy Hawkins, the way he hides the ball behind his right hip when he pitches out of the stretch. Hitters say it was hard to hit Hawkins because of that deceptive move. It doesn't deceive Gerardo Parra however, who's been killing Houston pitchers this year. He triples to the deepest part of the park in center, scoring Johnson easily. That makes it 6-3 Arizona.
Ninth inning: The Astros go down without a whimper against fill-in closer David Hernandez. Final score: Diamondbacks 6, Astros 3.
It could have been worse, but either way the Astros gift-wrapped first place in the NL West to the D-backs. All in all, 'twas an interesting matchup to watch, as it was essentially a microcosm of the club's season this year. 2012 people...2012...
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